Smoking Lettuce: Auto Tune the News #5

Gregory Brothers return with another stellar jam, this time tackling among other things lettuce and smoke mp3: Lyrics: Lyrics: ML: Any world order That elevates one nation over another Will fall flat SG: Ah, snap ML: I think that goes against the idea of American exceptionalism SG: Exceptional fast food and exceptional dance moves. ML: Most Americans believe that this country was gifted by God, a blessed nation, and that we are better. SG: Yeah, we the promised land, a sacred place, gettin blessed by Joe Biden in space! JB: God bless America! All: Ay! JB: Gah-awd bless America! All: Ay!! JB: God bless, God God bless God bless America!! All: Ay-men!!! SB: Do you realize if you were to take that lettuce, dry it, and roll it, and smoke it... MG: I know, it tastes like goat shit. SB: You smoke your lettuce. MG: Believe me, I've tried. SB: You're gonna end up with similar problems than if you were smoking tobacco. MG: I know, fo sho, you should try it with tomato - burnin salad in my throat! RM: Steve Buyer, warning complacent Americans about the risks of smoking lettuce. MG: You can warn me all you want, but you'll never stop my leafy green fetish. SB: It's not the nicotine that kills! It's the smoooooke! The smooooooke. Cancer: it's the smoke. Heart disease: it's the smoke. Respiratory disease: it's the smoooooooke! It's the, it's the inhalation, it's the smooooke, the smooooooke. If they wanna obtain their nicotine, it's okay. It's the smooooooke, the smooooooooooooke! SG: The more produce we come across, the more problems we see. KC: Some companies say they've received hundreds of applications for just a single opening. One man sent a shoooooe to his prospective employer EG: Shawtayee, don't you know That Air Jordan was from meeee? KC: I wore a long, white eyelet dress and a floppy white hat And carried a walking stick EG: Oo-wee! Am I crazy, am I trippin on shrooms Or you singin bout pimpin on the late night news? Katie Coo, baby boo, you got swagga like a star Don't stop, real talk, we gon take it to the charts! You can be KC: Lady Gaga EG: I can be KC: T-Pain EG: We can be KC: Bringing on the boogie EG: Droppin rhymes like rain You can be KC: Lady Gaga EG: I can be KC: T-Pain Both: Bringing on the boogie EG: With floppy hats and pimp canes LC: We've got some breaking news Let's go to Tracy Burns--she's got all the news TB: Actually, Liz, I think you wanna jump up to Robert Robert: Tracy, baby, you crazy I don't know what the hell's goin on Or where the camera belongs Let's go to Nicole NP: Me? Robert: Yeah, you NP: Me? Robert: Baby boo NP: Me? Robert: Whooo-ooooooooh NP: Me? Robert: Nicole don't know; let's throw it to Joe Joe: Uh, you know, I'm, uh, tryna get a hold of this myself Breaking news guys, um I, I don't have it, Liz, I have to send it back down to you I'm afraid LC: Okay, that's okay But the basics of it is Clearly this is a fascinating story

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